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Stacy Yardley [: 00:00:09

It was my first week in the circus, and the pressure to hit my show weight and the overwhelming homesickness hit hard. But it was meeting Susie, a 67-year-old elephant that changed everything. Together, we performed front and center, teaching me valuable lessons is self-mastery and being in the right place at the right time. Join me as we explore these experiences and more on today's episode. Are you ready? Let's go. Welcome to Life is a circus. So let's step into self-mastery, where we explore the balancing act of unlocking your inner potential while navigating life's chaos. I'm Stacy Yardley, your host, a former circus showgirl turned transformational life coach.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:01:00

If you're juggling multiple roles or responsibilities and feeling like life is a circus, you are in the right place. Join me each week for captivating tales from my circus days and insights on realizing your dreams. Whether you're an entrepreneur, business owner, or an aspiring leader, this podcast is your guide to self-mastery. So grab your top hat, and let's step into the greatest show of all, the circus of life. Ready to embark on this transformative journey together? Let's begin. It was only the 1st week of stepping into this dream of performing for the circus, and I was beginning to get a glimpse of the potential nightmare it could quickly become. Since I now needed to lose weight as soon as possible so that I could hit my show weight, I got up at 5 AM the next day and headed to the gym. While I was there, I quickly became overwhelmed as I felt out of shape, not just physically, but mentally as well.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:02:06

All at once, it hit me. I was miles from home. I missed my friends and my family, and everything suddenly felt hard and scary. I was so overwhelmed that I started to cry, and I had to go outside to try to pull myself together. And the more I tried, the worse it got. Homesickness was upon me like a tidal wave, so I made an early morning call home to my mom, and it helped comfort me just a little bit. Afterwards, I headed back to the train, and when I saw my roommate, Nicole, I told her what had happened, and she gave me a big hug. And it was just what I needed.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:02:43

Shortly after that, we headed over to the arena for another full day of rehearsals. It was late that morning that we broke into our designated groups around 11 AM, and I headed out to the yard located just outside the back door of the arena. The back lot area, also referred to as the yard, would also serve as the staging area for the animals before they would go into the arena to perform. And today, we were using it for practicing mounting, riding, and dis dismounting the elephants. I was so excited to meet the elephant that I would be assigned to ride for the show. And as I walked into the open space, the herd of 15 elephants were already there waiting with the trainers by their sides holding bullhooks, calling out commands to make sure they stayed in place. A bull hook is also called an ancus. It's a wooden stick with a metal hook on the end that the trainers use to grab the harness and sometimes guide the elephants in a particular direction.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:03:43

The elephants were docile and gentle, like overgrown puppy dogs and eager to please, yet gigantic and intimidating in size. As they swayed side to side, chirping and flapping their ears, a few lifted their trunks throughout the air is if to smell us as we entered the outdoor space. Gunther Gable Williams, the highly respected animal trainer and star of the show, was walking around and assigning the girls to certain elephants. Gunther was a very passionate man about his animals, and he was protective. He had high expectations for his crew, And if we ever spotted a cut or anything indicating the elephants were being mistreated, we were to report it to him immediately. There's a running joke amongst circus people that says the animals were treated better than the performers. And while it's said in a lighthearted way, it's not far from the truth. In fact, Gunther treated his animals like family, because to him, they were.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:04:44

Gunther was a German man with a petite body frame and white blonde hair. He was the epitome of an animal trainer as he was muscular but agile and would train his crew to respect his animals just as he did. As I stood there waiting for directions, Gunther walked over to me and pointed at me and said, you, that one, and pointed at Susie. Susie was the smallest and was roughly around 66 or 67 years old. We made quite a pair as I was the youngest showgirl and she was the oldest elephant. I would later learn that Susie would be the first to enter the arena through the curtain in the final act of the show, and here I was chosen to be the lucky one on top of her. Because she was so old, she couldn't do many of the tricks that the other elephants could do, such as climbing or standing on a bull tub, the heavy round metal pedestal upon which the elephants sits or stands. And instead of doing the final pose called the cross mount where all the other elephants stood on their hind legs, placing their front legs on the back of the elephant in front of them, and then they form a congo line of sorts towards the center base elephant.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:05:57

They had Susie lay down on the ground front and center with me on top of her. Daisy and Bambi, 2 African elephants that no one could ride because they were too wild and unpredictable, also shared the front and center spotlight with us as they stood on their hind legs by doing a mini cross mount by leaning on her back from either side right behind me. All of the other elephants in the circus herd were Asian elephants, with the exception of Congo, a gigantic African elephant that only Gunther rode. During the final cross mount at the end of the Elephant Act, the elephants covered the entire span of the arena floor. And there we were, front and center of it all. At first, I really wanted to be on another elephant that did more tricks, but I was so grateful to be on Susie and to have the honor of being placed front and center with her. It turned out that I would later be photographed as I sat center ring, and that image would be used in various marketing materials throughout our time on the road, including being painted on a giant mural of circus legends that now sits in the Yardley Museum of Art in Sarasota, Florida as a part of circus history. Before I knew it, the moment of truth was upon us.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:07:17

It was time to learn how to mount the elephant, and many of the showgirls were anxious around those magnificent creatures. But for me, it was an exciting moment as I had a love for animals, and this was truly an experience of a lifetime. When it was my turn to mount, I was instructed to do an underhand grab on a leather harness, the side of her head with a hand, and then place my left foot on her leg as a trainer commanded, leg up. Then in perfect timing, she would lift her leg, and as she felt my foot connect with her leg, she would thrust me upward, launching me onto her shoulders as I held the harness so I wouldn't be thrown completely to the other side of her. When I arrived on top of this magnificent creature, I noticed her skin was tough and wrinkly, and she had black wiry hair that stood about 2 inches high. It poked me through my tights as I sat in awe that I was on top of an elephant. I was then instructed to just sit right behind her head on top of her neck and place my feet behind her ears where there was a natural divot indent. It was at that moment that I felt her ears begin to flap against my calves, and I was told that was her way of saying hello.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:08:34

We went on to practice walking as a group in circles, getting comfortable with how the elephants moved. Dismounting was pretty much the opposite of how we mounted, except it was important that when we came down to hold onto the harness until we were on the ground. Because sometimes, the elephant might drop her leg too fast, and we could hit the ground pretty hard even though we were still standing up. Over the next few days, elephant practice would be a part of the rotation as we began putting the show together. And while we were taught to get on and off the elephants that day, we still had to experience what it would be like when the elephants began to trot at higher speeds. This would add another layer of difficulty and fear of falling off an elephant because that's certainly not something you wanna do. Over the next few days, we would rotate between web practice, elephant riding, and learning more of our dance routines. We would also be fitted for more costumes and circus life continued to unfold both in and out of the arena.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:09:38

This was just the beginning of a beautiful relationship I would come to develop with not just my designated elephant, Susie, but several others that I was fortunate enough to ride as I became the alternate rider. This happened because I was in the front and center spot. So when another girl was sick or injured, they could take me out of that front spot and then place me in the missing spot along the lineup. I would then be assigned to fill their spot temporarily. This gave me the opportunity to experience the different elephants' personalities as well as the difference in riding each one of them. Some were easier to ride than others. I'll share more in the future on this podcast, but for now, let's dive into some questions you may have when it comes to my stance on the very controversial topic of having elephants and other animals in the circus and how riding an elephant can serve as an excellent metaphor when it comes to self-mastery. I realize that the topic of having animals in the circus is a very controversial topic, and so I'm going to be sharing with you today my personal perspective from my own experience.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:10:51

You may have a different one, and that's okay. And what I will say is that my stance now at 54 years old is much different than it was when I was 18. And I want to encourage you to listen with an ear of understanding and compassion knowing that our opinions can change even day to day. Right? So, again, I'm gonna share from my personal experience, and will hopefully give you a little bit more insight as to how you see it. I will say that whenever I have shared over the years that I was in the circus, many people follow-up with the question of how are the elephants really treated. And what I can tell you is that while I never witnessed any beatings or things like that, I did have a moment one time where the elephant had a cut on top of her ear. And so I reported that, as I mentioned, to Gunther right away, and he definitely responded with urgency and disciplined the trainer that was in charge of that elephant. So, you know, like I said, Gunther was very good to his animals.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:12:03

And some people would say that being good to your animals is not chaining them up and teaching them to do tricks as wild animals, and I wouldn't disagree with that. I have to remind those of you listening that many of the elephants, at least the ones that I was aware of, were born in captivity. And so when elephants are born in captivity, they know nothing else. So if they were to be released into the wild, they wouldn't survive. Now does that justify it? No. It doesn't. And like many other industries, you're always gonna have your bad apples. There's always gonna be people who are the opposite of what the majority are.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:12:43

Right? And so oftentimes, what I would say to people is, you know, the animals for many of these animal trainers are their way of living. They're their bread and butter, And so they're not going to abuse them or treat them horribly so that they could, you know, potentially lose them. They love their animals. And Gunther, like I said, absolutely loved his animals, treated them as family, and oftentimes better than family, you know, to some degree. And so the trainers that I knew would be there first thing in the morning, would be the last ones to leave, and would do everything that they could to make sure that the animals were under good care. We had a veterinarian that traveled with us, and they always got what they needed. Now with that said, you know, were they chained up? Yeah. They were.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:13:32

Yes. There were. In fact, in: 2014

Stacy Yardley [: 00:14:22

And, unfortunately, she was not well mentally and ended up snapping during a show one time and subsequently was killed. This was in Honolulu, Hawaii. And so that story alone right there, when I watched that documentary, I will say that I was in tears. My heart broke for that elephant because she was mistreated, and she was put in situations she never should have been in. And so, you know, I just wanna just preface my experience with the fact that, again, I had a good experience. I never witnessed any abuse other than, you know, the cut that was on the ear that one time. And, again, that's from the bull hook reaching up and pulling down, much like if you were to catch something on your skin and pull too hard, it could rip it and tear is, and that's essentially probably what happened. So would I agree that there are abusive situations? Yes.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:15:23

m Ringling, which happened in: 2016

Stacy Yardley [: 00:16:12

n a sense that in the fall of: 2020

Stacy Yardley [: 00:17:08

However, I was excited for them that they were gonna now be retired into the natural habitat that they could live free. So, you know, it comes with a lot of mixed emotions. And while some would say, well, that's not really a stance. You're not taking a stance one way or the other. And you're right. I'm not. Because I think that there's a lot of gray zone in here in that some situations where if a baby is born in captivity, they know nothing else. And the tricks that they were taught were tricks to, like, their natural body and what they would do in the wild as far as standing on their hind legs, you know, things like that.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:17:46

But at the same time, we're training tactics done probably by trainers that were harmful. Yes. And there are some videos out there that you can find that are horrible to watch, and I do not endorse those whatsoever. But, again, I will say that my own experience was pleasurable and honoring to these beautiful creatures. With that said, I am glad that there are no more animals in the circuses. I do feel that we can enjoy the art of circus without animal acts. And so the greatest show has come back, and they're now animal free. And there are many other beautiful circuses around the world that do not house animals, and those I am all for.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:18:33

As far as other smaller elephants or smaller circuses now that continue to have elephants or other animals, I'll just simply say that without knowing their personal, you know, practices, without actually being there, I can't accuse them of anything. Right? So I am just simply say that I'd rather they not be in those situations. But, again, the people that I knew and the experience of the people that I had with were all positive. And my personal relationship with the elephants was beautiful. I love those creatures. They were all unique in their own way, and I feel extremely fortunate for the time I had on the show with them and the chance I had to work with them so closely. I can recall a time when I was on one of the elephants named Mary, and she was a little bit stubborn. Some would call her stupid.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:19:26

I think she was just more stubborn than anything. And when Gunther would call out, you know, round up round up for them to round their trunks up, she would ignore him and not do it. And so I would be on top of her, and I would call out her name and say, Mary, round up. And sure enough, she would round her trunk up and blow hot air out of it, and a piece of spit or 2 would land on my face. And I felt that was just an endearing way of her saying hello, and I heard you, and I'm rounding up. But it was definitely an experience to have such an amazing creature be so willing to obey my own command, right, from on top of her. So I would say that's my stance really on the elephants and any abuse that was there. Like, these elephants, again, were loved deeply and I would say treated with the utmost respect is my experience.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:20:24

And with that, I'd like to move into our topic of self-mastery. And I'm a person that really loves to use metaphors in my coaching a lot, and riding an elephant can be an excellent metaphor when it comes to self-mastery. The reason is it encapsulates the dynamic between the rational mind and the emotional or instinctive part of our psyche. So here's how the metaphor breaks down for you, and I want you to think about this in the way of imagining how you currently are operating. Okay? So the rider, the elephant rider, would be the rational mind. This would be the thinking mind, our conscious rational mind. It's the part of us that's capable of planning and decision making and logical thinking. The rider has the intent and the vision for where to go.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:21:14

Okay? Then there's the elephant, and that represents the emotional instinctive mind. So the elephant symbolizes our emotions, our instincts, the subconscious drives, the part of us that is powerful, sometimes unruly, and often drives by desires, fears, and habits. You see where this is going. You have the elephant and you have the rider. The elephant is the emotional instinctive mind. The rider is the rational conscious mind. You also have the control and cooperation. So self-mastery involves the rider learning to understand and work with the elephant rather than trying to force it.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:21:58

Right? So just as the rider may be attuned to the elephant's needs and moods, we must acknowledge and manage our emotions and instincts. Okay? So it's understanding ourselves, it's knowing our emotions, knowing that they're unruly, and they can quickly become reactive. Communication and patience is very important. So effective communication between the rider and the elephant requires patience and practice. Self-mastery also demands that we develop strategies to effectively manage our emotions and our impulses. When it comes to the balance of power, the rider is much smaller and weaker than the elephant. Just as again, your conscious mind is much smaller than your subconscious mind. 95% of what you do is subconscious.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:22:55

And so while the writer can guide and influence, the conscious mind can guide and influence. The elephant has the sheer strength to overrule the rider if it becomes agitated or scared, just like the subconscious can overrule when you're agitated or scared or stepping out into your dream, the subconscious can self-sabotage or step out to self-sabotage. Right? So it's the training and conditioning that's required. So over time, with consistent effort and mutual understanding, so you understand yourself, the rider can train the elephant to follow their lead more reliably. Meaning, your subconscious can be retrained, can be managed in such a way that you can use it to help you to follow you more in your conscious ways. So in the same way, through self-discipline and emotional intelligence, we can train ourselves to respond more thoughtfully rather than react impulsively. Riding an elephant can also take the right or places they couldn't reach alone. So much like integrating a rational mind with our emotional depth can lead to greater personal growth and discovery.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:24:14

Trust and mutual respect between rider and the elephant are also very crucial. Self-mastery involves building a respectful relationship with yourself, recognizing and honoring both our rational and our emotional sides. It's not one or the other. We don't just follow our emotions all the time and lead by feelings, but we also understand that rationality and consciousness is not the only way to go. There's a blend between the two, and it's understanding and recognizing both and honoring both and learning how to master yourself in that way. So in essence, this metaphor illustrates that true self-mastery isn't about suppressing or ignoring our emotions or instincts, but rather about achieving harmony and cooperation between our rational and our emotional selves. So when it comes to your own journey a self-mastery, I gonna ask you, where are you? Are you more leaning towards the subconscious where you were self-sabotaging or you're reacting emotionally going with your first reactions? Or are you working through your conscious mind through emotional intelligence, through self a, and understanding how your reactions are impacting you? And then being able to step back, take a moment to look and observe, and to move forward with thoughtfulness, with self-control, and with more mastery. So I hope this episode has given you something to think about.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:25:50

One, in the way of your past. Right? So when we look at our past and things that we've done in the past, we may not have the same viewpoints as we once did, and that's okay. And we can still move forward and change our viewpoints as we continue to grow. And in the way of self-mastery, we are much like an elephant and a rider. Our conscious mind is the rider. Our subconscious mind is the elephant. And through a symbiotic beautiful relationship with ourselves, much like the elephant and the rider, we can achieve beautiful things and magnificent things. So I hope this episode has given you something to think about.

Stacy Yardley [: 00:26:35

We'll discuss this more in future episodes. For now, I want to encourage you this week to stay aware, stay conscious, and ask yourself when you're reacting to something, is this something that you can take control as a writer and maneuver through the obstacles, or are you just going to let your emotions run wild? Thank you for joining me on this episode of “Life is a Circus, So Let's Step into Self-mastery". I hope you found inspiration and valuable insights to carry with you on your journey. If you enjoyed today's episode, please share it with a friend and subscribe or follow wherever you're listening. Remember, in the circus of life, the greatest show is the one you create for yourself. Until next time, keep embracing your dreams and stepping into self-mastery. Take care and I'll see you next Tuesday.